KILL ALL THE VAMPIRE WRITERS
A novella by Robyn Dennison
Jefferson Stark is pissed. As the world’s only authentic vampire, he’s had a belly full of bland Barbie-and-Ken blood-suckers and those silly Hollywood monsters with fangs and capes. Real vampires don’t drink blood, turn into bats, or burn in the sunlight. They just read good books, download videos, and sip tea brewed from the ashes of a human heart. Jefferson looks like road kill and smells like a dirty diaper, so he doesn’t get out much. Now, for the first time in 200 years, he’s going to be proactive. He’s going to eliminate everyone who writes romantic vampire fiction. It will be his contribution to American literature, a little “thank you” gift from the undead to you – the soon-to-die.
AUTHOR'S NOTES:
Eventually every nonfiction author snaps. We see the dollars rolling in to the writers who just make stuff up. So back at the dawn of DIY e-books I came up with a series of novellas starring preternatural characters. The idea was to poke fun at genre monster fiction while, well, writing monster fiction. I thought it came out pretty great, but $58 and a decade later, I'm not so sure. Which didn't stop me from writing a cozy mystery novel that still resides deep in my hard drive, waiting to be released. The second in the KILL ALL series is also waiting to be finished. You can still download my baby for $1.99 on Kindle.
FICTION
87 pages
Kindle Direct Press
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